Tag Archives: change

Re-Define Creativity. Life Coaching Tools – Blog and Podcast

Michele Benzamin-Miki Re-Define CreativitySTAYING ALIVE: PART THREE – RE-DEFINE CREATIVITY. We have to be honest, we’re biased in favor of people with a creative sensibility, whether they’re artists, designers, photographers, musicians, writers, performers, or simply people who bring the spirit of creativity and spontaneity into their lives. Here’s five reasons why.

Life coaching tools and resources from Five Changes

1. To be human is to be creative. Creativity is the essence of human experience. It is change and innovation, experimentation, wonder, curiosity, or the simple desire to do something new. We express it as play, travel, conversation, work, day-dreaming, and lovemaking. Everything is enhanced by the quality of creativity we bring to our life. Repetitive tasks can be transformed by changing your thought or intention behind that task, or by simply changing how you do it. Creativity is what gives you choice; to stretch, to challenge yourself, to play, and to grow. Creativity is not just for children and artists, it’s our life-blood. It’s how we stay alive.

2. Play. Let’s play! Creativity is as simple as a child’s laughter, spontaneous and free. How much can you let yourself feel? What is more important than your ability to wonder and respond, or to see with new eyes, hear with new ears  .. another’s face, another’s words, sunset or sunrise, what was called in classical Chinese, “the ten-thousand things” – the whole wide world. Creativity is the pleasure of being present to the world. Why not ask yourself when you wake up in the morning, “How much pleasure can I let myself feel today?”

Re- Define creativity - communication - play

3. Communication. Creativity is communication. Wherever we happen to live, our language is the roof and walls, the windows and doors of our experience. Even in silence, how we speak to ourselves will define how we experience the world. Our words are constantly changing. No two sentences are alike. How we speak is how we make friends and allies, or how we make enemies. It’s how we tell the world who we are. If actions speak louder than words, then actions are the verification of the internal conversation we have with ourselves.

4. Self-care. Creativity is how we care for ourselves. The impulse for innovation and change, the instinct to adapt, or to celebrate, to pause or to move forward. Whether through unrestrained improvisation or a ritual act, through an artist spending a lifetime on a body of work or a spontaneous instant, the confluence of elements that make for a perfect moment. There’s something about living at the edge of your comfort zone, and dancing with the unpredictable and spontaneous creative. True self-care is also cultivating your limitless imagination.

5. Problem Solving. Everyone has challenges, everyone is faced with change. Creativity is an essential element for problem-solving and fluid adaptation. Sometimes just doing what you have never done before to address an old familiar problem is all you need to do to change everything, including your sense of whatever it is being the problem you thought it was.

Re-define creativity exercise play self-care

Exercise, Re- Define Creativity for your self: Here’s a simple strategy you can use – to start a new project, or inspire you when you’re stuck. Take a book, a large book is always best, and open it at random. Point to a word on the page without looking. Then write the word down. Repeat this two more times. Now you have three words selected at random. Use those words, whatever they may mean or signify to you, to come up with a new approach to your problem or project. For more on mentoring, training and coaching follow this link.

Creativity. Life Coaching Tools – Blog and Podcast, Life coaching tools and resources Eating Meditation, Define Creativity, Developing your instinct , Deizing the moment, Walking Meditation, How to fix procrastination, Cultivating Perfect Timing, dreativity, play, communication, self-care, problem solving, creativity definition, Re-Define Creativity, mediation, nlp, spiritual practice, Neuro linguistic programming, Hypnosis, personal development, unconscious mind.

 

Life Coaching Tools and Resources. Podcast

Life coaching tools and resources STAYING ALIVE – ONE.  By staying alive we are talking about living at you peak emotionally, spiritually, intellectually, and physically. There is no belief associated with this, other than the assumption that it is better to be more alive rather than less .. and that many systems actually encourage resignation and distancing from experiencing life, fully and simply .. as it is.
Life coaching tools and resources from Five Changes

 

Did you ever learn something that immediately became so obvious that you couldn’t imagine there was ever a time when you had not known it? Like learning a shortcut that made a task quicker and easier than you’d even dreamed possible, or learning new skills you never thought you would, or realizing possibilities that were once completely out of reach.

Afterwards you may still pinch yourself occasionally to make sure it’s real, but you would never think of going back to the old way.

It happens a lot when we’re growing up – learning to walk, or learning to read; learning to ride a bicycle, or to drive a car; or leaving home to go on your first big trip; or falling in love for the first time, or having your first ‘committed’ relationship. There’s a first time for everything, and it’s good to keep going too, with new experiences, new challenges, new accomplishments. It’s either that or resign to the fact that life, and learning, and creativity, is over.

There are other sorts of firsts, less visible breakthroughs, like learning you can be free from an addiction, or healing from a supposedly ‘incurable’  disease, or ending a destructive relationship for which there seemed to be no way out; or breaking a bad habit that had dogged you all your life.

For me it was a huge moment when I realized that I could change my designated gender, and that I could show up in the world representing who I was on the inside. That may sound like a big deal, being transgendered, and it may lie outside the experience of most people. But actually it’s not such a big deal, because most of us have questioned how we want to represent ourselves in the world, so that who you are matches how you live. Some people end up hiding. But it’s never too late to come out as who you truly are .. who you truly can be.

Living a conscious life usually means just that ..  making conscious and sometimes difficult choices and changes .. not constantly, but certainly more than once in your life. That’s how you stay alive, because for our life to be alive it has to be a work in progress.

No amount of strategy or expertise will help if you’re still putting roadblocks in your own way. No amount of hedging and dodging will make up for seizing the opportunity to live (in the words of Mary Oliver) “ .. your one precious, wild life?”

CONGRUITY

Here’s the first of five qualities that’s essential for bringing out and nourishing this spirit of living. Because the question is always –  How is it possible to embody your truth when life tests you, pushes you to forgetfulness and compromise?

Life coaching itzhak-perlman

So ingredient number one is congruity. Congruity means that two things reflect each other—the inside and the outside, who you are and how you show up, your walk and your talk. If those things don’t match it will wear away at you, costing you time, energy, pain and frustration. Being congruent is an action, an activity, checking in with yourself, so that you remain true to who you are.

Congruity is also feeling and knowing that you’re on track. It’s like being in rapport with yourself. Not creating roadblocks, living the life of your own choosing, and loving it

You recognize it when you see it in others, and you recognize some other qualities that usually come with it .. focus, curiosity, adaptability, a willingness to help others .. the ability to see how best to do that.. in ways that are appropriate. So it also entails having healthy boundaries.

There’s a well-known story about the virtuoso violinist Itzhac Perlman breaking a string in the middle of a symphonic concert and rather than stopping and changing the string he just went on playing and improvised the fingering necessary to play the piece on three strings. He pulled it off brilliantly. The question is whether he knew he could, or simply trusted that he would find the way? So often we may imagine we must know ahead of time, when in fact your strategies are most useful once you know you can. This is more than simple faith, it’s a degree of congruity that lets you trust absolutely the life you’re living, even though you have no idea what’s going to happen next.

Life coaching tools and resources from Five Changes

Life coaching tools and resources, change, trust life, congruity, Life coaching tools, Spiritual congruity, Mediation, MLP, spiritual practice, Neuro linguistic programming, Hypnosis, personal development, unconscious mind.

The Trade-offs We Make : Deciding Life’s Choices

The Trade-offs We Make : Deciding Life’s Choices

To get something you may have to give up something else

jati The trade-offs we make

Jati

It’s been a couple of years now, but we still miss them, the long walks they insisted on taking, their wet noses, even their bad breath..

The good thing is that the land where we live at Manzanita Village, where we had dogs since we first came, is now filled with all kinds of wildlife.

Bobcats drink at our pond, packs of coyotes race around the houses at night, sounding like hooligans, wild turkeys and deer have taken up residence.

And with predators no longer troubled by our dogs, the ground-squirrel and rodent populations are leveling off.

The point is this ..

The Trade-offs we make

bobcat

 A trade-off needs to be made, you have to give up something in order to have something else.

It may be a relief or it may be a sacrifice, but in order to live by the ideals and successes you aspire to,
you have to make a trade-off and give up something.

Now, we love dogs, and we’ll probably have dogs again. And .. things will change again.

We’ll have to give up the bobcats, the deer at the pond, and the rabbits and the ground-nesting birds.

The choice is ours. The choice is always ours. For every change you make, something you may not have expected will also change, and with the trade-off’s we make, you might have to give up something you didn’t expect to.

Think for a moment about what could be yours if you only traded-off some of the things that were preventing you from changing:

  • self-limiting beliefs
  • assumptions and attitudes
  • habits
  • fears
  • friendships that hold you hostage
  • what else .. ?

More to come

The Trade-offs we make , To get something you may have to give up something else, Deciding lifes choices, worrying about the choices in life, Mediation, NLP, spiritual practice, Neuro linguistic programming, Hypnosis, personal development, unconscious mind.

The Truth Behind Your Dream

The Truth Behind Your Dreams
The Truth Behind Your Dream

Click here to listen to the audio Podcast version of this blog

The Truth Behind Your Dream: Every day we challenge the rational mind with our dreams. Every night we turn reason, time, and conventional meaning upside down. But dreams are more than the places we visit when we are asleep. When we speak of our dreams we speak of something more than the unconscious images and impulses that surface when we are sleeping; we also affirm the vast spaces of our hopes and aspirations.

When we hear Dr. Martin Luther King say, “I have a dream,” we respond to his words because we recognize that his inner world, and the outer world of his experience, are in complete agreement. He trusted his dream, and he made it real!

So the question arises, how can we learn when to trust our dreams? How do we know when to make them come alive, and what we should do to make them real?

Dreams show the inner truth and reality as it really is:
not as I conjecture it to be, and not as my client would like it to be, but as it is. – Carl Jung

Once I drove to Berkeley to stay with a friend. I had arrived early, and she had not yet come home. So I walked around the neighborhood near her house to pass the time. A young Brazilian woman was sitting outside a shop on the corner of College and Russell. She asked me if she could read my fortune, and I sat down in the chair next to her. She looked carefully at the palms of my hands and then looked up and said, “I think you do a lot of your spiritual work in your sleep.”

“That’s good to hear,” I said smiling, “Because I do precious little when I’m awake!”

Years later I am still thinking about what she said. Is it a metaphor, or is it a particular characteristic of mine, or perhaps of anyone’s, that she was speaking about? My reply was more than a joke to deflect her statement. I always had a vague sense that I knew a lot more than I had ever consciously learned. I assumed others felt the same. But where had it come from? Perhaps indeed, it had come from the world of my sleep and my dreams.

I am also thinking of the story of Carl Jung’s patient, a complete non-believer when it came to the power of the unconscious mind. She hardly ever remembered her dreams, but once she came to see Jung after a particularly vivid dream in which she was given a valuable golden brooch in the shape of a scarab beetle. As she was telling him about the dream there was a tapping noise at the window. Jung opened the window and a golden colored scarab beetle flew into the room. He caught it and presented it to the woman. Needless to say, her model of how the world interacts with the inner world that we call the Mind, changed completely that day.

A couple of months ago I dreamed of the traditional Marseilles Tarot, or more precisely of beautiful landscapes from another world that I instinctively knew were connected to the Tarot. Until that time the Tarot had been an obscure and meaningless jumble of random symbols. I hadn’t even though about it for over twenty years. After my dream I followed the call and eventually found a card-maker in France still producing hand colored cards as they might have looked four hundred years ago.

It was like beginning to learn a new language, that later turns out to be your mother tongue. It is surprisingly easy, as if I had known it all along. I am learning the words and the syntax, learning how to put sentences together. I am learning how, as a coherent visual language, the Tarot triggers my intuition, in ways that are deeper than anything I can figure out or explain. My partner Michele has followed me on this journey. We speak our new language together. I even find that I can use the cards with my clients, not as a substitute for what I do, but as an adjunct, a source of deep metaphors and rich analogies. It’s like having a friend and a mentor by my side. Who would have imagined? And all from a dream, just a few months ago?

I also find that sometimes my clients even come to me through dreams. I am working right now with a private client who I have known for some time, though I hadn’t seen her for years. She called me because she had a dream that she should begin working with me. It’s not the first time this has happened with a mentoring client. After all what is mentoring, if not making change on that same level where dreams arise?

Who am I to question such wisdom?

May we all dream our way to fulfillment and freedom!

In sleep, fantasy takes the form of dreams. But in waking life, too, we continue to dream beneath the threshold of consciousness. Carl Jung

The Truth Behind Your Dream,The Truth of Your Dream, challenge the rational mind with our dreams, making dreams real, trust in your dreams, Mediation, NLP, spiritual practice, Neuro linguistic programming, Hypnosis, personal development, unconscious mind.

After the Storm: I remember that day…

I remember that day .. and a Request

To listen to audio Podcast Click Here

This morning I woke after a night of deep sleep. For a moment I wondered where I was. Then I remember that I am in my own bed, in my own house, in the place in the mountains of Southern California that we call home.

After days of thunderstorms and rain the air is heavy and smells rich and fresh – even more than usual. As I open the front door I startle into flight a Great Horned Owl who recently took up residence in the trees outside the house. The first strenuous beats of her wings are loud in the still air, then she glides in silence to rest in another tree.

At that moment, and for the hours since then (it is now mid-morning) I know with absolute certainty the truth of  .. let’s call it The Big Picture .. that the universe is in order, that everything is perfectly balanced; regardless of our collective behavior and preoccupations, regardless of the circumstances of the world.

I remember that it’s up to me, to each one of us, to get into step with ourselves; to live our lives; to each commit, you could say, to our singular destinies  – whatever we each imagine that to be. I remember that everything we do, that the actions we take, and the results that we get, come out of that – let’s call it balance, alignment, integrity. I am not talking about a sequence here; first we get in touch, then we act. I’m simply saying that taking action without a sense of ‘destiny’ is in vain, depleting, and blind.

People who know me say that I tend towards enthusiasm; some might even say that my enthusiasm can lean towards the fanatical. Perhaps it’s just my certainty (I’m smiling), or perhaps it’s foolishness. So for many years I was a committed  (fanatical) exponent of the power of living in the present moment. As a meditation teacher it is what I did for a living. I shied away from ‘New Age’ versions of spirituality, finding them diluted and unappealing. I despised Affirmations! I imagined that ‘spiritual’ work, and the universe we inhabit, was much more complex, more challenging, than the simplistic mindset I associated with Affirmations.

Then cracks appeared in my internal model of the universe. I was certainly rooted in traditions, beliefs, and a spiritual practice that is inherently fluid. But institutions and human proclivities, including my own, can turn anything bitter.

I realized that unacknowledged disappointment, and my own resignation to it, had colored my world. I realized I had embraced (distorted) certain beliefs as a substitute for my own unresolved sense of sorrow. I also realized that there was nothing for me to do but heed the call, accept complete responsibility, change whatever wasn’t working, and move on.

Clumsily I began. And now, years later, speaking out loud to this morning, I say, “What an amazing and magnificent day it is! What an unlikely and surprising universe I live in! What a blessed life I lead with nothing to do except what I choose to do; and nothing to say except what to the best of my ability expresses the truth of this moment.”

And so I affirm, not a hope for the future, but a reality in the present that drives forward to help me re-imagine the future. And the movement is rooted, as it must always be, in a powerful and positive emotional state.

As we have learned, everything depends on your emotional state, and of course, only you can be responsible for that.

It doesn’t get any simpler!

Request. Can you help please?

Michele and I must hold some sort of record for never really settling on a tag line for Five Changes. If you know us, or if we’ve been on your radar, and you are a little unclear about what we do these days, we can’t blame you. If you are a recent client, or even came to a workshop, or trained with us in NLP, you may have an idea of what we actually do. If not, it’s not a complete surprise!

We’ve been brainstorming tag-lines and currently have these three, none of which quite hit the mark. Or do they? Let us know.

Which works best? Which inspires you most, or conveys best what you think we do? Any alternative suggestions are most welcome? Please let us know. We’d really appreciate your input.

Negative Self-talk Part 3

Be receptive towards the heavens, and active towards the earth.
— Chinese proverb.

Negative Self-talk To listen to this as a Podcast Click Here

The great thing about negative self-talk is that when you really pay attention it can teach you a lot about yourself. Unfortunately, if you’re swamped by negative emotions or if you’re feeling overwhelmed, you may not have the perspective necessary to learn everything you might. But if you can get some distance, your inner dialog  can be a gold-mine of information. After all, your self-talk is not really ‘you’, it’s like a radio station you happen to be tuned into. The secret is to find a better station to listen to. Before you change stations however, listen well. Sometimes it may be like listening to a one-sided news broadcast. Even though you know it’s propaganda, you can still hear a lot between the lines. It’s the same with your own negative self-talk. You can find out a lot about yourself behind the drone of self-doubt, or the propagandistic stories you’ve been telling yourself. You’ll always find alternative messages when you listen well.

Like a mirror held at right-angles, negative self-talk can help you look around the corner of your conscious mind to take a peek at your hidden beliefs and negative emotional patterns. When I say negative emotional patterns I also mean those insipid states that may not be acutely negative, but which keep you constantly at half-throttle; as if you have resigned yourself to remain in perpetual discontent, unmotivated, and distracted.

This may sound like a sorry prognosis of the way we conduct the conversation we have with ourselves, but I have found, over years of working with clients and students, that many people, unless they have done serious inner work, tell themselves things that they would never say to their worst enemy. Once we had a student staying at our center who would wake people in the middle of the night with a stream of curses directed at himself. His self-talk had started coming out of his mouth.

Just noticing some of the patterns can be very helpful. Do certain events trigger certain emotions; or do you give meanings to certain events; and the meanings (the story) then triggers emotions? Are there things you tend to do or not do, based on a specific sequence? Does some kind of negative inner dialog kick in at some point? Or is it just the feelings? Sometimes the meanings we attribute to certain events are so consistent it’s hard to identify them as an actual dialog in your head. It’s like the six o’clock news on Groundhog Day, going round and round, over and over again.

You may not be able to track these patterns on your own. The good news is that you can break them, you can change them, and when you do, you can free up immense resources of energy. You gain access to clarity and creativity, and then you start to feel really good again. It’s not just a question of changing the station you are tuned into, though that’s part of it. It’s more like getting a whole new audio system.

Some years ago a friend lend us his little hut above a lagoon in the South Pacific. From the deck, even from the bed, which was just a platform above the single room of the hut, we could watch the fish in the lagoon, the islands inside the reef, and the beyond that, the ocean stretching to the horizon. You can imagine what sort of inner dialog goes on in a place like that.

How to get a new voice

 

Negative Self-talk

1 Do what you love. At least some of the time, at least for a few minutes every day. Deliberately acknowledge it. Express your appreciation and gratitude.

2 Imagine and remember what you love. Remember the moments that gave you the most pleasure.

3 Be still. I’m not talking about meditation, because people often surround meditation with their notions and expectations. Do less than meditation, preferably in a place where you really like to be. Just stop for a few minutes  and be completely still. Relax and look around. Stay alert for signs and reminders of who you truly are.

4 There are things you can repeat out loud every day, ten times or more, in front of a mirror, or in your car, or in a room which you can fill with the sound of your voice. “I like myself. I really like myself.” Ten times. Different intonations, different volumes, different facial expressions, different postures, different gestures.

Or, in the same way, “Life is a fabulous journey, and I’m travelling it in a way that’s leading me to new discoveries every day.”

Or, “I celebrate my life as a unique expression of human life on planet earth.”

Or .. make up your own. As before, play with the sound, and with your body language. Think of it as sacred performance rather than as Affirmations.

5. Engage all your senses. Stimulate your ears with music you enjoy, make your own music if possible. Stimulate your sense of smell with incense, essential oils, flowers, spices. Engage your sense of taste with food you love, slow down when you eat, so you truly taste the food. The same with touch. Feel the texture of things, touch the people in your life, hold them, hug them, caress them. Treat your eyes to what you love, and really look. Seek out what is beautiful to look at, and then really look at it. Stimulate you mind. Study what interests you. Make it challenging enough to stretch you a little.

6. Walk on the earth everyday remembering that it is round and that always you are under the huge dome of the sky, and that beyond it there are more stars and galaxies than you can even begin to imagine and that you are connected to all of it. Imagine that all of it would prefer that you were really happy within yourself, that when you engage in negative self-talk it all fades a little. Imagine the Milky Way regretting something about itself .. how would you feel? It’s absurd to even think about isn’t it. Be like the Milky Way, because that’s sort of what you are.

To listen to this as a Podcast Click Here

 

Negative Self-talk Part 3, swamped by negative emotions, secret to overcoming negative thoughts,  Mediation, NLP, spiritual practice, Neuro linguistic programming, Hypnosis, personal development, unconscious mind.

Dealing with your Demons Wild Animals, and Ghosts.

Dealing with your Demons Wild Animals, and Ghosts.
demons“.. the world is not set up against you ..” Rilke

To hear audio of this post click here

In monasteries across South Asia food is left out as an offering for wild animals and for the spirits and ancestors of the land. A wise teacher from Sri Lanka, who had been a monk for sixty of his more than seventy years, used to say that if you have trouble with wild animals or demons the best solution is to feed them.

If ants are invading your kitchen and if you can see where they are coming in, put sugar-water outside, and they’ll leave your kitchen alone. It may be that having an attitude of working with your invaders—rather than against them—is as important as your strategy of feeding them. Where else in your life might this also apply?

Although you may never have met a ghost or even believe in their existence, I am sure there have been times when you have met your own fears. If you ever paused to speak with them, to make your peace with them, to feed them with the kindness of your attentive heart, then you know it’s true. The best way to make peace with such ghosts—and they are ghosts—is to feed them.

Everyone has experienced demons of one kind or another—in themselves or in others. Think of them as a metaphor for negative emotions running wild, acting out, striking out indiscriminately, monsters with insatiable appetites, looking for approval, safety, retribution, comfort, or love.

You would be wise not to feed such demons indefinitely lest you turn into a monster yourself. Feeding them is the best place to start. You do it with acknowledgment and awareness. It’s how you lure them into the light of day.

Setting Boundaries

We all do the best we can with the resources we have available. we deal with our demons, If demons rise up inside us, it means that something has to change. New resources must be found. If all you do is continue feeding your demons you remain or become a rageaholic, a shameaholic, a depressionaholic, an addict to anxiety, habituated to your own serial disappointments.

So the insatiable patterns and needs I have been calling demons, once lured out into the light, must be addressed by more drastic means. The usual sorts of kindness won’t help in this instance. Strategies for masking them or dulling them are temporary solutions at best. Action is necessary, the sort of drastic action that may be completely outside of your comfort zone .

Negative emotions, and the self-defeating actions that have dogged you for so long that they seem to be part of who you are, are not who you are. The limiting decisions and beliefs that you have carried for years do not define your destiny.

You may imagine that the past is fixed while the future is an open book. Actually the reverse is true. The future is fixed so long as you shy away from challenging and transforming your demons. The patterns and perceptions and habits of the past can, and must be changed, if you are to step into your life, free at last …

For a complimentary strategy session .. click here

To hear audio of this post click here

 

Dealing with your Demons Wild Animals, and Ghosts.Wild Animals, Demons, and Ghosts Meeting your own fears head on. Mediation, NLP, spiritual practice, Neuro linguistic programming, Hypnosis, personal development, unconscious mind.

Emotional State: Emotional Intelligence

Emotional State: Emotional Intelligence

emotional state5 Ways to Change Your Mind

When it feels like the world is stacked against you. . When you are completely out of sync. . When there’s something you’re simply NOT getting . . You don’t usually think of yourself as a victim, but right now it seems like everything is just too hard. Sometimes you think there may be something wrong with you. There’s certainly something you’re not getting. You’ve run out of solutions. And you’re not even sure you’d be able to recognize a genuine solution if it dropped in your lap.

Everyone hits a wall at some time; reaches their limit, exhausts their resources, runs out of ideas. If you have never hit a wall, then probably you’ve never risked enough, or questioned enough, or dreamed enough. And the issue isn’t whether you hit the wall, the issue is how well you recover when you do; how well you learn, adjust, change your perspective, honor it, and ultimately benefit from the experience.

The first thing to know is that your emotional state is entirely yours to choose. You may hit the wall, and run out of options; but as long as you know that you do still have choices, and as long as you know that how you feel is a choice, then everything about your situation can change. Every thought we have is shaped by our emotional state. There is no such thing as pure cognition or pure emotion. Your experience is a system of patterns, perceptions, memories, thoughts, feelings, and habits. And you can learn to change it all extremely quickly by changing your emotional state. In fact speed of implementation is one of the key aspects of effective internal change; and one of the reasons NLP is so effective is because it utilizes this principle of speed of implementation.

Meanwhile here are five simple strategies you can use when you hit that wall, or as needed to shift a negative mindset. They are variations on the theme that you can be master of your own life by being master of your own emotional state.

The 5 Simple Skills: For a balanced Emotional State

  1. When you fail to pull something off. When you are disappointed or confronted with one more seemingly insurmountable obstacle, say; “This is the best thing that could have happened!” You may not know how that could be, you may not believe it, you may feel ridiculous, but say it, aloud. Say it again, “This is the best thing that could have happened.”
  2. Alternatively, you can also ask, “What is there for me to learn here?” You can even start a list of the lessons that may be embedded in your experience after you get over your initial disappointment and fear. Maybe you remember the story of Thomas Edison’s struggle with the light bulb. He had made a thousand unsuccessful experiments. When someone sympathized with his struggle he replied, “You’ve got to be kidding. I’ve just discovered nine hundred and ninety-nine ways how NOT to make a light bulb!”
    Don’t even wait for a time when you NEED to ask. “What is there for me to learn here?” is a question you can usefully ask at any time. It will expand your perspective.
  3. Say, “Thank you.” To the universe, spirit, God, Dharma, whatever you call it .. to life, to this moment. Just say thank you. Think of it, four billion years of planet Earth, evolving and changing, and eventually coming up with little old, entirely unique, YOU. Imagine! How COULD you respond other than with “Thank you”? You never expected any of this. Even one single moment of your life is a blessed miracle anyway. “Thank you.”
  4. Stop. Break the pattern. Whatever you’re doing, do something else. Go to the movies, go to the mountains, go to the beach. Connect with someone you haven’t spoken to in a while. Invite someone over for a meal. Simply do something different. Or pick a random word from a book and use that word to construct your next action.
  5. Anchor yourself in what you love. Ask the question, “What do I love?” What motivated you in the first place? What is driving you to where you are? Then ask yourself what underlies that? What did you dream of doing and being as a child? Go back to the dream, back to your ‘first’ love. Drop the cynicism, doubt, disappointment. Meditate a little by placing yourself in that mindset of possibility and promise. Remember who you are — unique, mysterious, a tiny point of consciousness in an ocean of possibility.

There are plenty of people who have abandoned their dreams; or who are lost in cynicism, or who have lost faith in their own ability to embody the human artistry of their unique magnificent manifestation. You owe it to yourself and to those you love, and to all of us, to step into the power and beauty of who you are. Take risks, take the time to nurture your vision, find a mentor, ask for help. Be like Edison — don’t ever stop.

Life rewards those who embrace it!  April NLP Training

Emotional State, Emotional States, Mediation, NLP, spiritual practice, Neuro   linguistic programming, Hypnosis, personal development, unconscious mind. Emotional Intelligence, 5 Ways to Change Your Mind.

Mindfulness and Clearly Defined Outcomes

two kids on a fence.. if you don’t have a destination or a goal how will you ever arrive there? And, if you are so focused on your goals that you forget where you are, how will you know where to begin? To pursue your dreams, and to live fully in the present, that is the key ..

Permanent Personal Change

whirlingThere are those who make change in their lives willingly – because of restlessness, because of inspiration, or through curiosity. They begin by changing their habits, or their external circumstances, or the meanings they give to things. And once they truly change any one of those things, the others change too.

Then there are those who accept change only when they must.

How we change is our own responsibility and our own choice. Change is not good or bad in itself. We each look for happiness after our own fashion.

There’s an idea in many circles that real change is hard – personal change, social change, organizational change … But often change is simpler than we think. By looking from a new perspective, by considering factors previously disregarded, by challenging basic assumptions, a new world of possibility opens up to us.

One of the great masters of Budo (a physically demanding Japanese dance and performance-art form) didn’t take up the art until after he was seventy.

Thomas Edison went to school for a total of only three months then went on to become the man we consider the most brilliant inventor and engineering innovator of all time. The original business of Richard Branson, which have made him one of the richest men in the world, was named Virgin because everyone in the company, including himself, was completely new to business.

Neurolinguistics (NLP) is based on studying how we make change, internally and externally, and how we make, and can change, the meanings we make of things.

It’s not a religion, or a cult, or a sales technique. Originally it was developed by modeling such luminaries as Fritz Perls, Virginia Satir, Milton Erickson, and Gregory Bateson.

As someone who has been passionately interested in the nature of change for as long as I can remember – as a Buddhist teacher, as a poet, as a clinical hypnotherapist, and as a women of transsexual experience – my passion for Neurolingistics has reawakened because I have come to it as the tool par excellence for implementing effective person change in any area of your life or work, and as the ideal compliment to any personal or spiritual discipline for change.

- I hope you can join us for our ten day training in July http://www.manzanitavillage.org/retreats/nlp/