Mindset and Change • Outsider Buddhism • NLP • Success Coaching for Creativity and Change • Conscious Leadership • Meditation • Communication Skills

Manzanita Village


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NLP Certification

April 2-14 2012

Residential Training.

Manzanita Village, Warner Springs.

Inclusive price $4494

Two-pay option $2320

Bring a friend for half price

REDUCED PRICES THROUGH JAN 31

Practitioner and Master Practitioner Certification. Residential Training Program. Accommodations and meals included!

Tel: 760-782-9223 for information or to reserve your place at special price!

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Trance Gender.
Freedom from the binary paradigm. Retreats every Spring and Fall.
A Quotation for Today
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Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation.
Oscar Wilde

Slideshow of the Village

Photographs of Manzanita Village Retreat. Some recent, some recently revisited. Enjoy!

For a larger version of this slideshow click here

Outsider Buddhism

SimplicityPost-Buddhist perspectives

‘Buddhism hasn’t has an original idea in 1000 years.’
Edward Conze. Thirty Years of Buddhist Studies

Buddhism arrived in the West early in the nineteenth century, after the centuries of Western economic and political expansion. Asian religions like Buddhism were certainly known to travelers and missionaries long before then, but it was not until the early nineteenth century that Buddhism fully captured the western imagination.

The nineteenth century was one of social and philosophical upheaval, both for the west as well as for Asian cultures newly exposed to western ideas, education, and values. So inevitably, the versions of Buddhism that have come to the West, from that time forward,  have been impacted by Western ideas, directly and indirectly, at the hands of both Western interpreters and Asian exponents.

Sometimes Buddhism is used to refute western ideas and support traditional world-views and values; sometimes it is adapted to meet the west on the west’s terms, to make it palatable and accessible; sometimes it takes on the form of an apologia, to appease disparagement from the West and to meet Western approval. Some in the West, like Schopenhauer in the 1830s, and of course many since then, hope to find justification for their own ideas by affirming common ground with Buddhism. Inevitably, Buddhism in the west continues to be filtered through Western ideas and expectations of it, just as Buddhism in Asia is influenced by its western adaptations, as well as by conservative reactions away from them.

Cultures are not static. They adapt in the same way that living organisms do. If true stasis ever existed, it would lead to stagnation and extinction. This is as true for a culture, or an idea, as it is for a species. Cultural experience centers on the evolving tensions between opposites, tradition and change, inertia and momentum, innovation and tradition.

The interplay and tensions between nomads and farmers, between urban and rural populations, between orthodoxy and heresy, between members of one religion and another, between invading and indigenous people, is often the lifeblood of change and renewal, however violently it may play out, and however self-defeating the long-term consequences may be. Tensions of all kinds are how cultural renewal, change, and innovation, and the impulse for human survival, have found expression down the ages.

No wonder then, that as a species we also hunger for unchanging truth, for ideas that are pure and reliable, uninfluenced by the flux of human tides. Our quest for it may be as old as human thought itself. How many angels can fit on the head of a pin? Why am I here? How did neutrinos and quarks emerge in the milliseconds following the big bang?

The quest for certainty has shown itself in Buddhism as it has in all the great traditions. Instructions handed down from founding sources have been taken to be absolutes, whether we call it Dharma, or The Word of God. How wonderful, an impartial observer might say, that the Truth has so many complex and contradictory ways of expressing itself!

Exponents of Buddhism often pride themselves on the practicality and flexibility of their tradition, and the fact that they have no need for a ‘God’ or of any transcendent authority. Teachings about the relativity and subjectivity of the ‘self’ – anatta, and of the nature of reality – śunya, have provided Buddhism with an effective eject button whenever there has been a tendency to be caught in absolutes. However, this has not prevented what has come down to us as instructions, anecdotes, or analogies to be taken as literal truth. Such is our hunger for certainty. Such is the tension between knowing and being, between understanding and embodiment – another tension of opposites that plays out inside us.

Truth and power are inexorably interconnected. The quest for redemption through certainty, for the security of knowing oneself to be one of a ‘chosen’ group, for knowing oneself to be ‘right’, has played into the hands of those who would wield power. Whether that power is exerted consciously or not, benevolently or not, it has been the proving ground of another polarity of opposites – those who would contest and challenge the status quo, and those who would maintain it; those who favor certainty, and those who favor the ongoing quest for being, however uncertain the ground may be.

There are always individuals who at different times, and in different ways, deliberately or accidentally, have placed themselves outside the status quo. They are those who favor being and embodiment over knowing and certainty. They are part of a tradition within Buddhism that itself goes back to the earliest time, and includes Ananda’s insistent request to the reluctant Gautama, the historical Buddha, that women should be included in the monastic order. The Third Zen patriarch had to flee the monastery for his life because he did not conform to the status quo. A well-known Korean teacher of recent times was publicly scolded in his youth for taking the shoes from the nuns’ quarters and placing them outside the abbot’s door.  In private the abbot quietly praised his student’s mischief.

Can there be Outsider Buddhism in the west when there is already so much innovation and adaptation, Edward Conze’s assertion that Buddhism has not had an original idea in a thousand years notwithstanding? As Buddhism finds its place in a rapidly evolving global culture, it continues to look for ways to integrates with Psychology, Movements for Social and Environmental Justice, Science, Business and the Arts. Isn’t Buddhism in the west already Outsider Buddhism?

Perhaps… Yet orthodoxy also evolves as part of the normal course of events. Inquisitors or public witch trials may no longer exist as they once did. Yet, just as there is an urge to innovate and integrate, so there is also an urge to conform, to be right, to convince others to agree, to be the arbiter of the authentic truth, by whatever markers authenticity and truth are measured.

Buddhist Outsiders may reject orthodoxy but they also play a part in the evolution of the whole. It is important that we see beyond acts of innovation or rebellion towards a deeper appreciation of the spirit of this tradition we know as Buddhism.

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A Charmed Life

Live on Purpose - Click for CalendarHave you ever wondered how everything seems to go right for some people, while others just keep beating their heads against the wall? Or after they learned to stop beating themselves up, they are lost in disappointment and regret; going round in circles, wondering why things are so hard. How many people do you know who are always blaming life, other people, and the past, for the difficulties in their life?

On the other hand, how many people have you met who seem to be living a charmed life; who make their own good luck as they go; and who always seem to turn difficulties to their advantage

Not so many, right? But wouldn’t it be wonderful if you could actually learn to live a ‘charmed life’?

The truth is, you can. It’s a lot easier than you think. Anyone can do it. It begins with one single, simple skill: the ability to FOCUS.

How you focus, and where you direct your focus, determines just about everything in your life. And the best kept secret has always been that it really is much easy to change everything (by changing your focus in very specific ways) than you think.

You may have been taught that it’s difficult or impossible to change, that meditation is hard, that it takes years. But when you learn to change both how you focus, and what you focus on, you change everything. New attitudes, like new growth in springtime, change how you think, live, feel, and respond to the events of your life. Positive change becomes so easy you’ll wonder why you were so stuck before. Things start to go round and round again, but this time in a whole new direction.

I am not talking about having superhuman concentration. This is not about accepting someone else’s belief system, or putting your life on hold, or joining or subscribing to anything other than your own ability to change. It’s about learning to live by choice; it’s about mastering negative emotional habits so that you are no longer fighting a battle inside.

Now Live on Purpose, at Manzanita Village, is an immersion in simple essential skills for mindfulness and focus; exquisite tools that transform everything about how you can now move from feeling stuck, to knowing you can live a life of genuine celebration, internal wellbeing, and freedom.

Whether or not you think you know something about meditation, join us for this silent retreat to learn tools for mindfulness and change. Begin to use meditation not just as a way of passively observing, but to actively heal self-limiting beliefs, and persistent negative emotions. In these three days we will guide you through skills that you can easily incorporate into your life.

How is it that the simplest things are often made to seem like they are complex? Are you ready to unravel the tangle of the limitations from your past that tell you what you can and cannot accomplish? Click Here

Earth Day 2011

earth viewI had felt ambivalent about Earth Day since it first showed up in the early 1970’s. Isn’t every day Earth day? Would fish celebrate ‘Water Day’? Like Black History Month, Women’s History Month, and Mother’s Day, it seemed to be too little too late. After all, isn’t mindfulness and awareness – in a Buddhist context or otherwise – best used to sustain our gaze to include what is most often missed, as well as all that is most apparent? Isn’t mindfulness of breathing also mindfulness of the planetary cycle of carbon, nitrogen, and oxygen; of rainforest, phytoplankton, and emission controls?

No doubt my thoughts have as much to do with my own obtuse contrariness as they do with the truth of the matter. And certainly, anything that directs our collective attention towards the bigger picture of our planet is of incalculable value. If only for a day!

Our species is in population expansion overdrive. Our demand for resources – food, fuel, water, and weaponry – vies with our adaptive ingenuity in a ways that would have any extra-terrestrial spectator on the edge of their extra-terrestrial seat. Or perhaps they might be groaning in horror and disbelief. “How do you do it?” I can hear them say. “How do you manage to blind yourself to the long term consequences of your policies and activities; and then come up with apparently brilliant solutions, many of them almost as shortsighted as the problems they solve?”

“And the trouble with you spiritual practices,” they might add, “is they are almost as much of a problem. They have the nasty habit of becoming another way for you to avoid the consequences of your actions.”

“Elegant systems of denial and resignation, however time-honored they may be; do not seem to be any more valuable than the shrill pronouncements of the more ardent progressives and activists among you. They are just ways for you to not look at the big picture of what you’re doing to each other.”

So on this Earth Day 2011, pondering the pronouncements of my extra-terrestrial friends,  I turn off my computer, say a little prayer for the people of Libya, Syria, Azerbaijan, Yemen and  Japan, and for my friends who tackle violence and injustice head on, and for everyone I can think of or imagine, and take a long walk over the hills beyond our gate, marveling at the vibrancy and beauty of this extraordinary, resilient, and still vibrant planet we call out home, before returning to help prepare lunch for the dozen or so Taiwanese who are staying here this week for a retreat – their own way of celebrating Earth Day perhaps.

Choiceless Awareness and Clearly Defined Outcomes

If you don’t have a destination or a goal how will you ever arrive there? And, if you are so focused on your goals that you forget where you are, how will you know where to begin? To pursue your dreams, and to live fully in the present, that is the key. Caitriona Reed

The words ‘choiceless awareness’ describe a natural state of mindfulness. Choiceless awareness means being fully present to your life. It does not mean making NO choices. Obvious? .. You’d think! ..

If you have ever imagined that ‘spiritual’ practice or mindfulness was a way to avoid embodying ALL the possibilities that life offers you, or if you’ve confused awareness with inactivity or resignation … then we have something that might be perfect for you .. BIG PICTURE MINDFULNESS .. Now Live on Purpose! This work provides you with tools for a fully integrated and engaged spiritual practice.

Choiceless awareness simply means that whatever happens is the best thing that could have happened. Whatever it is, you CAN deal with it. You can even respond by saying so: “This is the best thing that could have happened!” not because you understand why … YET!

The attitude you embody by saying those words allows you to make the best possible choices as you move forward and to embody the power inside that allows to live fully ‘at choice’ and to move to ever greater clarity through having clearly defined outcomes..

Check for upcoming retreats and workshops click here

Los Angeles April 2-3

Introduction to NLP Intensive

April 2-3, 2011

“Change doesn’t happen by doing different things. it happens by doing things differently. It’s not what you do, it’s how you do it!”

Living a life that brings you deep person satisfaction, creativity, and happiness depends on your openness to learning new ways of doing and being- on deep inner flexibility and openness.

The question is: How much longer are you prepared to go on repeating yourself and getting results, that you know are much less than you are capable of?

The tools we will teach you in this weekend intensive are modeled on the skills, mindset, and inner strategies — for creativity, communication, excellence, and attainment of the best of the best .. Einstein, the Buddha, Nelson Mandela, Carlos Ghosn, Richard Branson, Rumi, Harriet Tubman ..

This two-day introduction to NLP in Los Angeles April 2-3 will NOT give you a new model for how to live, it will give you a key
to creating your own model –one that is flexible, creative and responsive to the actual circumstances of your life ..

Register now to receive a $500 discount on our NLP certification training April-June

Caitriona and Michele

“Some people say they haven’t yet found themselves.
But the self is not something one finds;
it is something one creates.”
Thomas Szasz

Fools’ Enlightenment

Autobiography in a very few words

I once imagined that if I found the right teacher, the right path, and that if I tried really, really hard to get ‘it’ ‘right’ .. and that if I could understand what apparently I did not yet fully understand .. then everything would be okay, and I would magically wake up to be someone else, not my ‘self’ – which I didn’t like very  much, and which I had been told was an illusion anyway. I would wake up to be an entirely different person!

And so I undertook a fool’s journey to enlightenment.

Then I learned that life is both easier and harder.. which is something, it turns out, I had known all along. I learned (remembered) that no singular set of beliefs or behaviors can provide an absolute solution to the puzzle and miracle of living. I learned that ultimately it’s up to each of us to discover the truth of our lives.

I also learned some really, really cool tools from the ever-evolving field of NLP .. well, NLP is not a field exactly, and they weren’t tools exactly  .. more a way of thinking outside the conventional Aristotelian mindset box .. which is more of a tyranny of NOT thinking than a mindset.

Also, I had been teaching with Michele for many years already, so I decided to stop teaching the fool’s way, to stop helping people get comfortable with their limitations, and instead to start to help them feel un-comfortable enough, so that, like me, they might step outside the Aristotelian box .. and discover that just about any pattern of thought, belief, perception, feeling can change, and more importantly, can BE changed!

More on “Aristotelian boxes” coming soon ..

Relationship basics

The relationship you have with others, whatever sort of relationship that may be – professional, romantic, and everything in between—is inevitably a reflection of the relationship you have with yourself.  That means that any internal conflict you have within yourself— any conflict of values, or unfinished business – will show up on the outside.

People ask how they can change what they are  completely unconscious of. “How can I change what I haven’t been able to change through years of therapy, counseling, meditation, visualization etc.?”

The truth is that the energy you have devoted to the negative, and the difficulty you have assigned to changing it, is a big part of the problem.

It’s not a question of struggling to solve your problems and achieve your dreams. It’s a question of coming from the place where you dreams already live, that forgotten place where you KNOW solutions are possible.

That and some specific, seldom taught  tools to help you clear the debris from your heart and spirit. People who love learning to change their old limiting beliefs and world-view love this work. Click here.

Secrets of a Great Relationship

“Love does not consist of two people gazing intently into each others’ eyes, but by their looking out in the same direction from a shared vantage point.” Antoine de Saint Exupéry

For upcoming series and workshop click here

Many otherwise extremely successful people have reflected that without the intimacy of a sustained and loving relationship all their accomplishments mean very little; and that without someone to share their success, their life remains empty and unfulfilled.

As humans we are wired for connection with others. We are social animals. We have evolved our primate sensibilities and perceptions over millions of years. Our skills for communicating and interacting with other people embody the essence of who we are. Have you noticed that those skills seem to grow stronger when you are in deepening proximity to others, or more precisely to an-other, with whom you are coming into increasing degrees of intimacy and loving ease?

Without the sort of intimacy that we experience with a mate, a companion, or a lover, we may be missing an essential catalyst, something that is uniquely capable of moving us towards  greater fulfillment.  I do not just mean sexual intimacy, but something more encompassing – that may or may not include sex.

There is much to be said for solitude. We may indeed be wired for that too. Some of us thrive on it. However, it may be that the stillness we look for in solitude is only a substitute for the profound quiet that evolves so well in the crucible of satisfied love.

Carl Jung wrote that we marry our unconscious, which I take to mean that we marry what we unconsciously deem will complete us. Whether or not that’s a good thing is entirely dependent on what goes on in our unconscious world – beliefs, decisions that we made long ago, and the expectations we derive from past experiences and relationships. If we’re out of whack with our unconscious mind, any sort of marriage is likely to be a disaster.

Let’s say that by default we travel a journey towards wholeness, as best we know how. The journey is fuelled by deep forces within our cells and in our neurology. Our map is largely made up of those old beliefs, decisions, and perceptions. How conscious we are of them is largely dependent on how congruent we are within ourselves, in other words, on how congruent our conscious and unconscious mind is. The less we are in alignment with our unconscious desires, needs, and constructs, the more we are likely to run aground on the rocks of our unresolved issues.

Like the captain of a ship, our conscious mind calls the shots, but unless we have a good rapport with our crew (our unconscious mind) a shipwreck is imminent. If you are looking for a relationship to fix your failings with the crew, then the shipwreck is likely to play out as a difficult and painful relationship, or perhaps as the painful inability to sustain any relationship at all.

All this is to say simply, that a deep and healthy relationship fulfills a basic human need that the majority of people can benefit from; and that to have that sort of relationship you must first be in a good relationship with yourself – in rapport with your own unconscious mind.

For upcoming series and workshop click here

The keys are simple. Here are some of them:

  • Learn or know what you want. Learn what you value in a relationship.
  • Know that no one can ‘fix’ you.
  • Know that you are indeed marrying your unconscious mind and that however ideal your relationship is, you will always be learning something new.
  • Disappointment is a good teacher. You are usually disappointing yourself.
  • Communication is never 50-50, it’s always 100% your responsibility.

As a closing thought, I remember hearing an account of the last time that the great philosopher and social thinker Herbert Marcuse lectured at the University of Santa Barbara, shortly before his death. He spoke of his wife and family, of familial and romantic love. Here was one of the greatest political thinkers of his generation, speaking to a standing-room only auditorium, distilling his work down to its essentials, and coming up with the one thing that he, and perhaps most us, in the end, value most.

For upcoming series and workshop click here

The Future is Realer than you Think

Things I hear people say about living in the Present Moment

  • “I don’t like to set goals because it limits the possibilities of what may happen.”
  • “I don’t like to set goals because I am usually disappointed.”
  • “I don’t like to think about the future because it’s not real.”

Mindfulness is not about avoiding disappointment, complexity, and unresolved emotions. When used for such purposes it is not mindfulness at all, but a trance of dis-empowerment and disassociation. There is nothing spiritual about masking our fears with concepts and practices that dull us to the limitless possibilities of our lives.

We map time inside ourselves in our own unique way. Your experience of the present is as subjective and fluid as your experience of past and future.  Your mind makes meanings in its own way. Whether you consciously fulfill your goals and expectations or not, your unconscious agenda is invariably fulfilled. We navigate with the aid of the imaginary maps, returning to the same self-created destination, time after time. UNLESS we learn to redraw our map.

Redrawing the map means removing unconscious perceptions, old decisions, beliefs, and self-created limitations that you may have believed to be true for your entire life.

  • Unless you remove the unconscious blocks that prevent you from creating a new reality,
  • Unless you set clearly defined outcomes and KNOW that you CAN navigate towards them,
  • Unless you are prepared to learn from (rather than be a victim of) disappointment and change,
  • Unless you stop using mindfulness to avoid the past and the future,

you will NEVER get the results you would like!

It is not possible to resolve internal conflicts by imagining that only the present is real. Awareness is an indispensable ingredient to living creatively. Without it nothing is possible. But it only comes to fruition as you allow yourself to dream of what is truly possible, and to revise your imagined limitations of the past.

Let  go of any fear you may have for creating a bold vision for yourself. Resignation has nothing to do with humility, simplicity, or faith.

Were you  using mindfulness to mask your deep resignation, or to cover up  and avoid resolving your sense of personal limitation? What will happen when you allow yourself to use your ability for focus and clarity, and to link it to a vision for what is possible. What will happen when you commit to resolving those inner conflicts, set clear intentions, and KNOW that by doing so you create a new map, and more possibilities for having a powerful positive influence in the world that you ever dreamed was possible?

What can you begin to REALLY like about the future now?

“If you don’t have a destination or a goal how will you ever arrive there? And, if you are so focused on your goals that you forget where you are, how will you know where to begin? To pursue your dreams, and to live fully in the present, that is the key.”